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Photo:The First Gay Nigerian To Come Out On TV, I feel molested…’ in Interview

Photo:The First Gay Nigerian To Come Out On TV, I feel molested…’ in Interview

We reproduce an interview granted by Bisi Alimi, the first Nigerian gay man to come out on national TV. In 2004, he appeared on the popular NTA talkshow hosted by veteran broadcaster, Funmi Ayanda, New Dawn. Alimi wanted to challenge the misconception that there were no gay people in Nigeria. Following his appearance on TV, he was violently attacked and fled the country to Britain where he sought asylum.
He is a gay rights activist and he granted this interview to prolific journalist, Mercy Abang in April 2013. He called for a revolution in Nigeria and insisted that more Nigerians will vote in favour of a law protecting lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people (LGBT).

At what point in your life did you decide to be gay?
I get asked this question many times, but honestly it's pretty hard. I knew I have same sex feeling as young as 8 years, I didn't really act on it till I was around 10/11 years when I had my first male kiss and it felt so good.

I think many people will say this is what children do and I do agree as I have many friends who had same sex experience while they were young and they grew out of, so also I have friends who had heterosexual feelings while young and grew out of it. Children sexuality is very difficult things to predict and I think it boils down to dynamic around being a child as nothing is set in stone. My second kiss I remember very well was when I was in primary school and it was my final year, I was going to win a prize and I was going to perform as well. So there I was in the changing room with my crush in primary, he had come to see me get ready, when I was all dressed and ready to go on stage, he kissed and I think it lasted for about 1 minute, it was like heaven. I went on stage and I think in all my years of performing, that was one of the best in my life. Today he is married with children and I remembered few years back reminding him of that day, he smiled and said, it was fun while it lasted but that he had moved on.
I went on to secondary school and attending Eko Boys' High was big time fun. I think I started reaching the conclusion about my sexuality from around age 13. Secondary school gave me the opportunity to see myself better.

I was with other boys, some of them loved girls, some loved boys and it was just normally. Unlike many young gay people being bullied at the playground, I will say to some extent I enjoyed a bit of pampering in secondary, well mostly in my first year as my school father was a very influential guy and he loved me to bits.

By the time I was getting to senior high, it was obvious that yes, I was very different from everyone. Also I have made friends with 4 other guys are we had became the "gay" rebels. We were representing our secondary school in cultural activities. I remembered once we went as far as representing Mushin Local Government in Lagos during the inter-council cultural festival acting as girls. Those were the days. I remembered acting as a pregnant woman and one of the judges saying even a woman won't be able to do it better.

When I left secondary school, I had the biggest opportunity in my life to attend my first "same sex" party in Lagos, it was mind-blowing and an eye opener for me. And it was at this event I could say I actually used the word gay. I think from childhood I had always been a rebel, even against myself and using the word "gay" was something I was never comfortable with since I knew the word. It just doesn't fit with me at that time.
So by the time I was 18 years, I have started accepting to use the term gay for myself and in a way trying to find myself with all the confusion around me as regards religion, my sexuality and the expectations of the society and where I found myself personally. My teenage years were the most difficult as well as the most liberating


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